Why......... Options

[Blue]

do so many topics on here turn into point scoring and counter punching by the same few people?

I was really looking forward to taking part in debates (and some fun where appropriate) on here.............................

[spartacus]

I prefer to say "Why not?"

[cornflake]

I don't know, whenever I post things on here there is quickly a negative response to it. Fair enough if that's your opinion but they come across quite aggresive and personal sometimes.

Yowza.

[Biker1]

I don't know, whenever I post things on here there is quickly a negative response to it. Fair enough if that's your opinion but they come across quite aggresive and personal sometimes.

Yowza.

It's called "debating" - although I will agree with you about the personal and aggressive bit which are really not necessary but obviously make some people feel better.

[Turin Machine]

Yeah, the "chest puffers and forum strutters" , still they have an opinion, even if they can come across as humourless eejits at times.

[Blue]

I see a lot of this Forum's most prolific posters seem to have been inactive on here of late..............

[Roost]

Dude, everyone just needs to take a chill pill!

A good friends once said to me (and I try to live by it):

"Don't sweat the small stuff...........

............................everything is small stuff"

[wabbit]

I have to say I agree with Blue - this forum (and 'the other' one) do seem to attract some of Newbury's more argumentative, self-opinionated and prejudiced types. I don't personally think (and sincerely hope) that they don't represent the views and opinions of Newbury residents accurately because, if we are to be judged by some of the 'stuff' (I use the word advisedly) posted here, then Newbury is not a very pleasant place. I am thankful I don't live next door to most of the forum regulars!

Some 'refugees' from the other forum, who caused bother and upset there, have migrated here - some not even bothering to change their forum name, whilst others have re-invented themselves (and continue to do so) - hoping no-one will notice the idiosyncracies in their use of language. Some, it has to be said, appear to be completely fictional characters...

Any criticism, however mild (like Blue's) is always met by the usual 'chill out man' and 'everyone is entitled to their opinions' mantra thus halting any further criticism.

Of course everyone should be encouraged to express their own opinions but maybe the (apparent) aggression and prejudice does discourage those of a gentler manner from daring to be heard. And let's not hear any more of the 'if you can't stand the heat..' comments either!

As for the underlying misogyny which underpins many of the comments - e.g. female drivers have, very recently, been described as 'hideous' and 'ugly' (by two apparently different forum members) - it is any wonder that there is a massive imbalance in views here? If we want to hear from a more diverse group of people (with more interesting views), it may be that we need to think more carefully before posting unpleasantness!

I shall now wait for the (almost certain) attack....

[Strafin]

I see where you are coming from but disagree totally. The forum goes through phases and when different people post it takes different turns. As for the woman drivers comment, I do not recall more than one person being called ugly or hideous, and am fairly sure it was by one forum member; not two.

People who come onto forums generally are argumentative, opinionated and pedantic, otherwise they probably would have something better to do so you have to expect a bit of that.

And finally,

Chill out man....

[Andy Capp]

I tend to think that if it were not for the 'regular' posters, there would be few others who would post. I'd say the language on here is of an average standard.

[wabbit]

Sorry Strafin - I disagree.

About 6 yrs ago, I had a pleb shout out from a car window the same and that was by the A4 lights westbound by the hospital. I ignored the idiot. I choose to cycle on the road as that is my right.

Worse still was a few weeks ago. A hideous woman in an X reg Renault Megane UNDERTOOK me on my Yamaha motorcycle in Thatcham. I was doing normal urban traffic speeds but the bike does not accelerate as fast as a car. I exploded at her at the lights as you should NEVER undertake a motorcycle. Alas, I did not have a pen to get her registration.

I was, well am, at sainsburys. (iphone posting)

I was looking for a parking space and I noticed a woman was just getting ready to drive out, so i reversed into the parent and baby space opposite and waited. My engine was stiill running. I was looking at her space quite clearly and had no intention of parking in the baby space.

Instead of moving, this woman, whom i can only describe as ugly, took it upon herself to get out of her car, come across the carpark, stick her head in my window and go "where is your child???" as if she was the car park king.

I said i was checkig my phone and waiting for her to leave, to which she mumbled something and waddled off.

She drove an early 90's fiesta, cant remember the plate.

Anyway if she is on this forum, or if she reads this, how about minding your own business and stop trying to validate your pitiful life by attempting to put yourself above other people.

Otherwise you end up making yourself look like a fool.

Regards,
Angry vw golf driver.

Still... interesting that you have come out on the defensive on the question of misogyny here...

BTW, I don't do chill out and I'm not a man...but love & peace man to you! (check out my signature).

[Strafin]

Oh I'm sorry the way you wrote it seemed to imply that two people were calling women drivers both ugly and hideous. Actually one person called one driver hideous, and in another post a different person called another different person ugly. I don't suppose it really matters too much, but I do think that personal attacks go beyond the pale sometimes.

[Blue]

Looking at the members with the most posts the top 2 a GMR and an Iommi are way ahead of anyone else, I'm curious as to why they have fallen silent on here of late.

[Jayjay]

Accept the point made, but I dont take anything personally as nobody knows who I am, therefore it cannot be personal. I tend to ignore the posters who think the sun shines out of the council and the ones who disagree on every point made by RG as inconsidered, prejudiced views and find them boring. There are times when posts can be of a bullying nature but they are usually slapped down by other posters. Stick with the forum as there is a lot of humour on here, and most of the posters are genuine, nice guys.

[Guest_xjay1337_*]

Sorry Strafin - I disagree.




Still... interesting that you have come out on the defensive on the question of misogyny here...

BTW, I don't do chill out and I'm not a man...but love & peace man to you! (check out my signature).

Naming and shaming isn't really cool. If you wanted to make your point you wouldn't have tried to shine a spotlight on the people who made these god awful comments.

Of course everyone should be encouraged to express their own opinions but maybe the (apparent) aggression and prejudice does discourage those of a gentler manner from daring to be heard. And let's not hear any more of the 'if you can't stand the heat..' comments either!

Am I not allowed an opinion? There is one thing I hate more than rude people (as in the arrogant, stuck up aristocratic type of people who walk around looking down their crooked nose at people from the seat of their big 4x4) and that's people who don't speak their mind, or people who are too scared/worried of what society says is OK to say - as long as it's not hugely insulting to a group of people (so nothing racist or hatred inciting) it should be said.

Calling some woman ugly is not really rude, it's my opinion. Likewise if someone was to call me ugly, that's their opinion and it's only after repeated namecalling by people/persons who are supposed to be my friend would I get offended. Someone calling me something on the internet generally does not annoy me, nor would it hurt me if I jumped to conclusions about how someone went and parked, logged onto an internet forum and found that in a off-the-cuff post they included the word "ugly". I'd probably laugh!

Much like JayJay said... It can't be personal since you are unknown.

Plus the fact I was quite peeved off by this woman's actions lead me to making heat-of-the-moment remarks. It was nothing to do with her being a woman as I am normally very respectful of women and don't judge a book by its cover. If it was a bloke I'd have probably said the same thing. Hopefully that wasn't a sort of feminist dig (because I get the feeling if it was "ugly guys" your post wouldn't have been made..) But anyway, sorry it wasn't quite P.C enough for you.

Anyway, some people take life far too seriously. I try and inject a little bit of humour into every post I make. It's not often it'll go all serious and straight talking. Some people, on the other hand, treat every post, sentence and letter as fact and will blindly disagree with everyone, or be almost Christian-like (no offence to any lovers-of-Jesus on here) and try to FORCE their opinion down your throat with a sharp stick (probably a pitchfork of some kind).

It doesn't help that there are quite a few "members" who actually belong to the same household, whether it be brother and sister, husband and wife, or any combination of the two...so they turn it into a sort of personal internet playground (to be stupid in). It also wouldn't surprise me if there were people who used more than 2 accounts to create e-arguments for their own entertainment. Also I should let you know I have no idea what this "other" forum is that you mention (so I can only presume I haven't created a false identity) and I do not use any other accounts. I only signed up because I've been reading the forums for quite a while and decided I'd like to chip in as well! Check IP logs with admins should you not believe me.

The general level of this forum is quite mature and it's only inevitable that a bunch of middle aged men and women on a local town forum will end up talking about politics and that will be the main end of the forum. Also, with greying hair/hair loss generally tempers can get a bit lairy. Because once you turn 40, what else is there to do?

For a small town forum this is quite nice actually.

I am thankful I don't live next door to most of the forum regulars!

I'm a great neighbour. I am quiet, keep to myself, love cats and even take the rubbish out!

[Blue]

Am I not allowed an opinion? There is one thing I hate more than rude people (as in the arrogant, stuck up aristocratic type of people who walk around looking down their crooked nose at people from the seat of their big 4x4) and that's people who don't speak their mind, or people who are too scared/worried of what society says is OK to say - as long as it's not hugely insulting to a group of people (so nothing racist or hatred inciting) it should be said.

Ok I'll join in then.

How does someone walk around in the seat of a big 4X4?

Just asking? :-)

[Blue]

On another comment, I think from what I've read, more people on here bash the Council at every opportunity rather than sing their praises.

I would suggest a more realistic approach would be to treat every new subject on it's own merit.

[Guest_xjay1337_*]

Ok I'll join in then.

How does someone walk around in the seat of a big 4X4?

Just asking? :-)

Haha touche

[Andy Capp]

On another comment, I think from what I've read, more people on here bash the Council at every opportunity rather than sing their praises.

I would suggest a more realistic approach would be to treat every new subject on it's own merit.

Regardless of what people might think, that is how I try to approach any given subject, but we all can't help being a little prejudiced. It is only natural.

I am cynical of the councils, more so the NTC, but, I don't have a 'I must dis the councils at every opportunity' attitude.

[Blue]

Haha touche

Good lad!