I think that was a little too close to the mark Bill1! I normally really like your jokes, particularly the one you keep repeating, you know about Chelsea being the best football team.....
Here's one for you:-
It's the middle of winter. Communist Russia at the height of their power. A couple walk across Red Square.
Suddenly it starts precipitating.
The husband says to the wife "Look dear, it's raining", the wife replies "Don't be silly that is snow!"
Despite his wife's protestations, the husband is adamant that it is rain, he says "But look, it is not white!" The wife is equally adamant, saying "Perhaps, but it does have a solidity not normally associated with rain".
They continue in this vein for some minutes before the husband spots a friend walking across the Square. He presents an idea to his wife "Look dear it's Comrade Rudolph, he'll be able to help us and tell us whether this is snow or rain". The wife agrees "Da!" (Well they are in Russia!)
So they approach Comrade Rudolf and after a brief explanation of their concerns, he agrees to help them by determining the nature of the precipitation.
He catches some in his hand and examines it at length, he then licks the remnants and tastes its constituent parts. He then wets his finger and holds it in the air. He removes his large, furry hat and listens to the wind before finally, finally reaching the conclusion
"Comrades, I can say without a shadow of a doubt that this is indeed Rain".
The couple allow Comrade Rudolf on his way.
The wife is not easily assauged. "I still believe that this is not rain but snow".
The husband has, by now had enough "I've told you that it's not snow, it's rain. Comrade Rudolf has told you that it's not snow and as every one knows (wait for it)......................
.................................Rudolf the Red knows rain dear!"